Posts Tagged ‘This Ain’t Hollywood’

Totally Tubular Roller Derby Bingo

Wednesday, August 8th, 2012

This ain’t no false alarm! HCRG presents another unforgettable night of ROLLER DERBY BINGO AND DANCING, 80s style! So, like, totally whip out your acid wash jeans and leg warmers, and get ready to bust out ‘Friday I’m in Love’ for this night of dabbing and dancing!

Buy your bingo cards & dabbers from a skater to try your hand at winning great prizes all night, including cash, HCRG swag, and gift certificates from some of our favourite eateries such as Jack and Lois and Gallaghers! We’ll have HCRG merch for sale, a 50/50 draw, and fun contests throughout. Plus, don’t forget to stay for a gnarly night of dancing to all the best 80s music. Gag me with a tune!

So dust off that rabbit’s foot, hairspray your bangs, and try your lucky hand at winning – good times guaranteed!

Friday, August 24
Doors at 7pm | First game at 8pm
This Ain’t Hollywood
345 James St. North, Hamilton

No cover before 10pm! Fun on tap! Girls on skates!

RSVP on Facebook

Roller Derby ArtCrawl: Lucky Draw

Friday, April 6th, 2012

Fast skates, hard hits, rink rash and great feats of female athleticism are all part of this sport that’s taking the world by storm and spinning though all aspects of pop culture. Are you a talented artist and a die hard roller derby fan, or just fascinated by imagery that the revolutionary roller derby revival inspires? Then Friday, April 13th could just very well be your lucky day. This Ain’t Hollywood and Hammer City Records are hosting an Art Crawl night with the HCRG that will feature artistic interpretations of the sport, the women who play it and the officials that keep it rolling safe. The Hammer City Roller Girls will be on hand for this James Street North Art Crawl event, just ahead of the May 2012 home opener.

* Art work will be on display at This Ain’t Hollywood (345 James St. North) and Hammer City Records (228 James St N Basement @ Rear off Robert St)

* At 10pm, rootsy rocky The Saints Are Coming and surf trio The Dead Beat are set to take the stage at This Ain’t – Cover is Pay What You Can

* HCRG merch and tickets will be for sale

We are looking for roller derby-related art in all media that we can hang on the walls for the night and for a few weeks afterwards. Paintings, drawings, photos, original graphic art and ‘hang-able’ mixed media works will be considered.
Deadline for submissions/commitment is April 8, 2012.

For more information, email for more info and shipping arrangements (pick ups in the Hamilton area and central-Toronto are possible).

2011 Wheelie Awards

Monday, January 16th, 2012

By: Biggie Falls

Whether you’ve been a roller derby fan for a decade, or are someone who is just hearing about it now, there is one thing that you need to know about this community… Roller derby parties are crazy!

Ninja Miss Carriage gives Staplehead (League President 2006 - 2011) a hug.

This was more than evident at the HCRG year end party – PIRATES versus NINJAS. Every one of your favourite derby girls was there, dressed up and ready for combat. Whether they were looking for your bounty, or swinging nunchuks – they were ready to party! As in typical HCRG fashion, this party was held at This Ain’t Hollywood, on January 7th, 2011. As it turned out, a lot of the public was not prepared for what they might see on their regular Saturday night out with their friends.

Announcer Tedstosterone with Jewsy Flawless and Bean Stalker

The night started off friendly enough, sushi for the ninjas and pulled pork for the pirates, on opposite sides of the room of course. But soon it broke out into a full on ninja versus pirate battle! It seems to me like the ninjas won… but I may just be bias on that one. Although, there was one event that the pirates dominated in: The PvN limbo contest, with pirate Jewsy Flawless coming out on top!

The HCRG Rowdy Rowdy Refs

Awards were given out to refs, vets and rookies alike to celebrate the many victories HCRG has achieved within the last year, both on and off the track. To end the night, our very own Hot Carl, presented an incredible display of fireworks for us… as you would expect during a Canadian winter, this caused quite a stir with the locals. But it was absolutely wonderful regardless!

If you’re going to take anything away from this story, let it be your new found love and admiration of derby parties, and make it your new mission to come out to an after-party soon!


Queen Of Jam-A-Lot
Bitchslap Barbie

Pack Leader
Eduskating Rita

Getting A Leg Up
Jewsy Flawless & Bean Stalker

Hammer City Spirit
Scooby Doom

Rookie of the Year
Naughty Bee

Purple Heart
Miss Carriage

Best Foot Forward
Miss Carriage

Crash Test Dummy
Lucky Lady Pearl

Stickin Around
Judge Jodie

Practice Pusher
Bam Bam Bigelow

Rules the Ruleset
Eduskating Rita

Hardest Hitter
Mean Little Mama

Miss Jeckyl/Hyde
Peppermental (Formerly Hammerhead)

Strategic Whiz
Whacks Poetic

Training Maven
Bitchslap Barbie

Merch Mover
Dark Passion Play

Game Day Mainstay

Gives Till It Hurts
Little Red Rollerhood

Working It
Wild Rice (Formerly Tempura Tantrum)

Funds Raised
Scooby Doom

Paperwork Pusher
Judge Jodie

Bam Bam Bigelow

3 way tie! Dark Passion Play, Peppermental, Scooby Doom


Friendly Face
Deuce Willis

Ref For Hire

Certifiable Effort
Deuce Willis

Tightest Caller


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HCRG Pirates Vs Ninjas Dance Party!

Sunday, January 1st, 2012

Resolve the PvN debate — HCRG-style!

Join HCRG skaters, refs, NSOs, volunteers, visiting refs, and supporters as we look back at 2011 and celebrate another amazing season of derby in Hammer City.

Arrr you full of pirattitude? Or have a yen for ninjas? Whatever side you support, come on out in costume if you can. Our Rowdy Rowdy Ref Hot Carl has set up feats of pirate vs. ninja strength and skill to determine, once and for all, who is the ultimate warrior.

Oh and did we mention explosives? And fire? And lots of dancing, thanks to DJ LP? Cover charge is only $5.

This Ain’t Hollywood, 345 James St N, Hamilton
$5 Cover, 9:00PM

(PS – Was your resolution to join roller derby in 2012? If so, this is a great chance to come out and meet league members and get your questions answered before our next Derby 101 class!)

R.S.V.P. on Facebook!

HCRG Holiday Craft & Bake Sale

Monday, November 14th, 2011

The Hammer City Roller Girls are busy — knitting, beading, painting & pasting! During the James St N Art Crawl on December 9th, we’ll be rolling out a Holiday Craft & Bake Sale.

Derby girls are baking and crafting everything, and the proceeds are going to the St. Matthew’s House Adopt-a-Family program.

We’ll be setting up shop outside three locations along the Crawl route:
- This Ain’t Hollywood (345 James St. North)
- Hammer City Records (228 James St. North @ Rear)
- Outside the Lighthouse Fish Market (219 James St. North)

Come and load up on awesome gifts, hot chocolate and delicious baked treats — the perfect sugar rush before hitting the next gallery. We’ll have organic, vegan, raw, and gluten-free options for everyone.

Smackie O is feverishly knitting, Naughty Bee has a needle and thread in hand, and Hammerhead is already planning to make the world’s best vegan holiday cupcake.

We skate AND bake. We whip AND stitch.We give hits AND give back. Help us support families this holiday season. See you December 9th!

R.S.V.P. on Facebook!

HCRG Fundraiser November 5th!

Saturday, October 22nd, 2011

The Hammer City Roller Girls are rolling in to the Sour Mash N’ Thrash at This Ain’t Hollywood. The fundraiser is on November 5th, doors at 9:00pm. Tickets are available at the door for $15.00 Featuring performances by White Cowbell Oklahoma, Ginger St. James & the 454′s, and Ninety Pounds of Ugly. Raffles, prizes, 50/50 draw, shooters, dancing and fun on tap! There’ll be a free jello shooter at the door (First come first serve). We’ve got some amazing prizes – including a Derby 101 pack and a $200 Roughhouse Skates gift certificate.

Thank you to our event sponsors: Jet Cafe, Nickelbrook Brewery, Roughhouse Skates, Shear Elegance, The Ship, WhereHeadsMeet, Copydog, Gorilla Cheese, Manifest Yoga, La Petite Spa, Modify your Closet, Hammer City Records and Bean Stalker!

See you there!

R.S.V.P. on Facebook