Rollympic Scrimmage Re-Cap

Ballad of the Rollympic Battle at Pier 8
By: Typhoid Maggie #1869

The Hammer City derby league is made of young and old.
Harmonious they usually are, honest truth be told.
Until that day they chose to divide, and challenge each other’s skills.
On the rink they waged a battle of muscles, finesse, and wills.
The Golden Oldies, as they were known, got off to a strong start
Despite their creaky joints, bad hips and close-to-failing hearts.
But the Bronze Babies, they fought back, as the young are apt to do.
Miraculously, despite their fear, their diapers held no poo.
The Oldies faltered, and the Babies scored, over and over again.
“Grand slam, Grand slam” the announcer said, but the Oldies, they got Zen.
The Oldies, they fought back in the way only the dying do.
They closed the gap, but it wasn’t enough, the Babies’ lead stayed true.
But everybody won that day, skating down by the lake.
Old or young, never mind how many candles on your cake.

Babies' MVP Bitchslap Barbie #98 shrugging off a block from Bettie Shreds #250 - Photo by Derek Lang

The season-end Rollympic Scrimmage held at Pier 8 on Sunday, September 9th was an all-out success.

Babies MVP, Bitchslap Barbie, described the bout as “an amazing way to end the home season. It was great to see so many new skaters out on the track and the weather was perfect. If only there had been free sandwiches”. Oldies MVP, Sox Maniac, added “I had been looking forward to this game all year. Getting MVP was on my bucket list. It was the awesomest of awesomest”.

Thanks to all the fans, sponsors, and volunteers who supported us this season. Our league depends on you to keep us going! The 8th Hammer City Roller Girl season starts in May 2013. The schedule for the 2013 bouts will be published in winter 2013, so mark your calendar and check our website for updates.

Bout MVPs Bitchslap Barbie and Sox Maniac - Photo by Joe Mac

We’d also like to send out a big thanks to our Hammer City Rowdy Rowdy Refs. We may scream at you in public or openly question your judgment at times, but we admit it, you’re usually right. Keep up the good work and keep those eyes keen.

Thanks again to everyone from your friendly neighborhood roller girls. See you in 2013!

A Derby Girl’s First Bout

Read about Beonkadonk’s first bout as a Hammer City Roller Girl.

I’m very proud to say that I played my first roller derby bout with the Hammer City Roller Girls at the annual Bayfront scrimmage. I’m glad to report it wasn’t as painful or as terrifying as I imagined it to be. In fact, I had the time of my life.

Days prior to the scrimmage I found myself having minor anxiety attacks in the middle of the night, mid-conversation, and during work. In my mind I was thinking “what have I gotten myself into…am I crazy!?” Despite working myself up, I had a great support system of fellow league members, friends, co-workers & family to keep me calm at all times.

The day finally came and there was no looking back. As I tied my skates at the Hamilton Waterfront Trust Pier 8 Skatepad, I waited for my family and friends to arrive. At that point I was excited to bout because I figured my nerves would get better once we started playing. When the introductions were about to begin, all skaters gathered on the track. Now, it was time to start the game and I was on the first line-up. Yikes.

First whistle blows…

Beonkadonk in her first bout, booty blocking Daisy Dynamite #AK47

It felt like I stood…hit a few times (or got hit…I’m still unsure) and then it was over. Holy crap. Was it me or was everything going in fast-forward? I didn’t even know what happened, however, it did get better…and got less overwhelming with every jam. I hadn’t played a team sport in a very long time (it was back when I was 10 that I played soccer) so working as a team is still something I am slowly getting used to. I don’t want to let my teammates down so I put a lot of pressure on myself.

Before I knew it, it was half time. Other league members kept looking at me and asking if I was okay. I am assuming it was due to the blank look on my face. At times I was so concentrated on the game I was oblivious to what was going on off track. I slowly learned I needed to stick close with my line-up and prepare to be thrown on the track with little or no warning. Things were just happening so fast, there was no time to think…just skate, hit, fall, get-up and repeat. It’s hard to believe that one day when I have been playing long enough, a game might feel like it is going in slow-motion (as some other players describe). Right now, it’s still over-whelming, but well worth the mild anxiety attacks ever so often. It was especially exciting to see such a large and pumped up audience supporting the HCRG that day.

There is such a positive and motivating vibe around the sport of roller derby. It wasn’t long ago that I didn’t even know you could play roller derby, let alone in Hamilton. Here I am today almost finished my probation and closer to becoming a full member of the Hammer City Roller Girls. Being part of a team is a new challenge for me. My fitness goals are usually personal, like running marathons. However, playing as part of a team holds many more rewards. Thank you HCRG for helping me grow as a player and athlete!

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